Alarming News

October 29, 2005

The politics of attraction

I attended a debate of the City Council candidates in District 4 and 5 today. I’ll leave it to someone else to write about the issues, the jabs, the snarks and the policies (maybe Jess at the Observer who I had the pleasure of meeting for the first time today. I’ve already met the Politicker’s ex-intern Azi and current intern David, so that just leaves the elusive Ben), I’m going to write about the cuties in the audience.

If you’re thinking about getting involved in a local campaign on the east side of Manhattan during this last week, this is what you need to know:

Joel Zinberg has the cutest guys, mostly Jewish, wearing his prominent red buttons. Also, since he’s a doctor and a lawyer, the men around him are probably not just good looking but also successful overachievers. Patrick Murphy has all the hot girls working for him (and no, here comes the disclosure, I’m not just saying that because I’m working for him). The girls on his campaign are all of far-above-average attractiveness. It’s like they model, or something, but work on campaigns on the side. Being a Log Cabin Republican, he also boasts a strong contingency of gorgeous gay men. Dan Garodnick’s team is the whitest white boys. If you like blonde guys with huge teeth, that is the campaign for you. Finally, Jessica Lappin. I always see her around older people, I assume Gifford Miller leftovers or her parent’s friends or something. She did have a very young-looking (I doubt he’s even old enough to vote) Romanian guy, with a good sense of humor, standing outside like a young soldier holding up her placard (while every other candidate just, you know, hung their signs up on a post and called it a day).

So, there you have it. If you’re looking for hot straight guys, join the Joel Zinberg campaign. Want to meet gorgeous women and gay men? Patrick Murphy is for you. If you’re all about the Abercrombie big teeth look, Dan Garodnick is your man. And if you’re looking for a real mishmash of people old and extremely young, Jessica Lappin has got what you need.

(Just so there is no confusion, despite the disclosure in this post and also in the sidebar of my site: the opinions in this post, and all posts authored by me, are my own and have nothing to do with any of my clients.)