Alarming News

December 29, 2008

I got nothing

I always believed you were born gay, even before that became the only acceptable opinion on homosexuality.

I now know FOUR gay people who have “gone straight” and married women.

I also know one straight guy who, after a bad break-up with a woman, decided to only date men.

What’s up with that?

Posted by Karol at 11:52 AM |
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Comments

I’d say you know 5 bisexual men.

Posted by: Snoop-Diggity-DANG-Dawg at December 29, 2008 at 12:28 pm

“I always believed you were born gay…”
Never done time, I take it.

Posted by: Oschisms at December 29, 2008 at 12:31 pm

Never done time, I take it.
Every kid who seemed gayish turned out to be a gay adult.

Posted by: Karol at December 29, 2008 at 12:35 pm

I think there are people that are born gay, and also people that become gay. Note that this does not mean that choice is necessarily involved in either. There are environmental factors that can lead a persons psyche to homosexuality, just the same as environmental factors that help form other parts of personality.
Just my opinion.

Posted by: VinNay at December 29, 2008 at 12:40 pm

Everything in life is a choice. Tell me that you don’t know effeminate heterosexual men. Osch’s point stands.

Posted by: Casca at December 29, 2008 at 3:09 pm

VinNay is close to right. Upbringing and environment is probably a far greater factor.

Posted by: largebill at December 29, 2008 at 4:08 pm

Posted by: Snoop-Diggity-DANG-Dawg at December 29, 2008 at 10:18 pm

people can be born gay, bisexual or straight. Environment will only play a factor for the bisexual.

Posted by: PAUL at December 30, 2008 at 1:43 pm

people can be born gay, bisexual or straight. Environment will only play a factor for the bisexual.

Posted by: Anonymous at December 30, 2008 at 1:44 pm

people can be born gay, bisexual or straight. Environment will only play a factor for the bisexual.

Posted by: PAUL at December 30, 2008 at 1:45 pm

Paul, thou dost protest too much.

Posted by: Casca at December 30, 2008 at 8:30 pm

What we know about choice and determinism in human development is very hard to differentiate from what we only think we know. The players are pretty clear: Genetic inheritance, response to environmental factors, group trends in response to sexual selection pressures, and individual choice all compete within us and around us to shape who we are and our small portion of the world. To say those among us that identify as gay are “born that way” or “it’s all a choice” is an oversimplification to the point of being totally uninformative and essentially useless.
Human beings are neuro-plastic — neither fluid or rigid in brain function and repair. We are incredibly adaptive to our environments biologically and cognitively. We are subject to a compounding effect on our choices, the choices of those around us, our genetic pre-dispositions, and every other agent within the markets that make us. We are each an economy unto ourselves, with more than one single driving force dominant, and a multitude recessive factors to go with them. What’s most interesting is that while we are very much the sum of what has come before us there is forever something new that enters into our incomplete systems. No matter how much we think we perfect ourselves, the process is never over, the players are never settled, and the deck reshuffles both in seeming order and at random.
I think the only good answer to what makes a person gay is “What does it matter?”. Even if there were a much simpler answer than our experiences and our science hint at, why would we decide how to treat each other based on whether one was born gay or chooses to be? I’d much rather ask if someone is a good person, and why they are so. Are they a good parent, a good teacher, a good business person, or politician (ok that one is a stretch)… and what is it about what they do and who they are that inspires respect or appreciation for their values in the rest of us.

Posted by: kende at January 2, 2009 at 7:32 pm

kende you rock my world.

Posted by: wow at January 3, 2009 at 9:42 am

Kende, splendid.
I have a short way of saying what you said so eloquently: “people should be judged by their conduct, not their category.”

Posted by: amba at January 5, 2009 at 2:51 pm
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